In the Moment, a grizzly bear in a mason jar.
Posted on October 19, 2009
My birthday was on our honeymoon. Yeah, you heard me right. What the heck was I thinking!? That decision would leave one to believe that I am not a big birthday person and that I don't care much about a perfect excuse for indulgent celebratory attention. Wrong/Lies. The truth is, we couldn't think of a more fitting month wherein to marry and somewhere in my secret betsy dwelling was a strong hope that my birthday would not get overshadowed. Welp, hope lost this time. Funnily enough, it's the first time that I didn't care. If I had to do it over again, I wouldn't change a thing. But I am a year older and it feels a little like my birthday is just waiting around the corner for me to come and get it. W helped by giving me tickets to see Grizzly Bear. We went to the show last week.

Then I realized that I had allowed someone else's removed behavior to affect me in such a visceral way that I had actually joined forces with what I was fighting against. I allowed myself one last mind battle with the live music patron imposters, and then I returned to the show.
that little white thing on w's foot is found coral, btw
Grizzly Bear was incredible. Really, it was the music that fiercely thumped me out of it and back into it. The light was dim, blue light mostly while high hanging mason jars with little lights inside asymmetrically blanketed the band, like giant vintage glass fireflies dancing to the music. I loved that they created atmosphere, that they created place and perspective. The music ran from them into me, then went out through the top of my head and my fingers and toes and back to them. A beautiful circle, it was. Record THAT, iphone. (other pictures are from our honeymoon. we tried to stay in Hawaii while we were there and experience each moment for what it was. some pictures for sharing and remembering. balance.) ***Song of the Moment: While You Wait for the Others, by Grizzly Bear ***